1. Your body is SO YES.

2. You just massaged me from the inside.

3. Happy Tuesday.

4. My inner 15-year-old just gave me a high five.

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5. I’d have the butler bring you some water, but I’m afraid he’d be terribly jealous of us.

6. You should be president.

7. What are you doing every night in the forseeable future? 

8. Your passion and skill are unrivaled!

9. You should write a book.

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10. Your skin smells like YOLO. It just does.

11. I’m chaining you to this bed for the rest of your life. Sorry. 

12. Next time, change nothing.

13. Victorious! 

14. Even a terrible version of that would have been mind-blowing.

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15. Rinse, wash, repeat?

16. I have discovered world peace, and it is in your sex parts.

17. I know I can’t write about this on my tumblr, but I want you to know that I REALLY, REALLY WANT TO.

18. You taste better than a burrito.

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19. Thank you.

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